Anger

I totally fucked up last night. I was lying in bed and the blood started boiling in my veins and I wanted to beat the crap out of somebody. She was there beside me, and I never want to lay a finger on her so I left the room abruptly. I was confused, my head was spinning, I wanted to get sick but most of all I wanted to hit somebody.

I calmed down eventually but I got such a fright, I could feel tinges of panic under my skin. I don't ever want to inflict pain on another person ever again. I managed to walk away this time. And I will walk away again.

She didn't know what was wrong with me. I came back in and began playing pinball on my mobile to take my mind off the feeling of intense anger inside me. She thought I was texting the other girl I had the date with. I wasn't. That girl doesn't even cross my mind.

Anyway, I eventually clambered into the other bed and took a few swigs of water. I couldnt think straight and I felt I was going insane, I'd tipped over the edge.

But then I turned to her and explained what was wrong with me, she just hugged me before I burst into tears.

I ripped up my kleenex to channel the residue of anger before dreaming of watching Liverpool V Chelsea.

I was on the sidelines screaming at them.

I woke up this morning and felt much better.